Monkey's Uncle - An old story

I was such an interesting writer.

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“Can you do something for me?”

“Uh, what?”

Jim was in shock from what he was seeing. The gray bearded man, dressed in black, lay there in the dark alleyway, cars honking and people yelling at each other on the streets of the L.A. Slums. Jim had thought he would just be going to visit his 89 year old grandmother, and be done. But it seems things turned out differently. Now, you might think that in a place like L.A., it would be normal to find someone laying in an alleyway. But the difference about this man, was that he had a bullet in his side.

 “Please” The man sputtered out, blood beginning to seep into his thick beard. “I don’t have much time left.”

“Uh.” Jim hesitated. What was he supposed to say? What was he supposed to do? His mind was racing, and in his panic, he responded. “O-Okay. Yeah.”

The man reached into his pocket and pulled out a small case. “I-I need you to take this,” He coughed violently. “Take this to my niece, in Ireland. This is for her.”

Ireland? This man couldn’t be serious. How was Jim supposed to get himself to Ireland with the small amount of money that he had? He wasn’t even sure if he could afford the gas to drive to the airport. But, his thoughts were scattered when he opened the small case to reveal the most clear and pure diamond he had ever seen. It looked like it had come right out of a movie, perfectly cut and shaped in a way that it seemed to almost glow.

“I-” Jim stammered. “I don’t think I can do this. I just don’t have the time or money to-”

The bearded man reached into his dark jacket, fumbling around for something. After a moment, he pulled out a small paper bag.

“These... These will be enough to get you there. Just please, take the diamond to my niece. Her name is Mary Eastland, in northern Ireland.”

Jim opened up the small brown bag and gasped. Inside was pile of shining diamond, ruby, and gold trinkets, gleaming in the glow of the city lights. Each little nugget and chain seemed to emit a soft light that whisper to him.

Or maybe it was just the stress of the situation.

The strange man spoke again. “Promise me that you’ll get that diamond to her. Please...”

Jim stuttered as he tried to get out a response. “I-I-I promise. But I don’t know where to find her!”

“Northern Ireland.” The man whispered. His eyes began to close.

“I need more information than that! Please, I need more!”

Silence came from the man as he lay in the dark alleyway, eyes closed in an almost peaceful matter.

Peaceful. But dead.

Jim jumped up to his feet with a gasp. This man was dead. Dead! What if people saw him. What if they thought he had killed the man? What was he gonna do? Where was he gonna go?

Backing out of the alleyway, he looked up and down the street to find the sidewalks empty. And in a flash, Jim had disappeared, running down the sidewalks of L.A. as rain began to fall.

*                                            *                                              *

It wasn’t long before Jim suddenly found himself in front of a small cottage in the middle of northern Ireland.. It was a white cottage with two windows on the front. In between these windows was a bright red door, which seemed oddly out of place.

Nervous, and a little bit excited, Jim walked up the dusty path to the door. Knocking on it, the door resounded with a loud knock. As the door opened, it seemed that no one was at the door.

“Down here, twerp.”

Jim looked down to get the surprise of his life. There, on the ground right in front of him, was a small chimp wearing a orange, flowered dress and a backwards baseball cap.

“Um.” Jim stammered a bit. He was sure how he should respond to a talking monkey. “Uh, is Mary Eastland home?”

The chimp responded with a gravelly voice. “Yep.”

An awkward silence ensued.

“Um... Well, may I speak with her?”

“You’re talking to her right now, pal.”

“Oh!” Jim startled. This was Mary Eastland? A chimp? “Um...” He quickly fumbled around in his pockets, struggling to get out the small package containing the diamond. “I-I was instructed to give this to you.”

As soon as he got it out, the chimp, well, Mary snatched the small box out of Jim’s hand. “Who’s this from?” She questioned him as she inspected the package.

“I-It’s from your uncle. In L.A.”

“Hm.” She murmured as she opened up the small container. Reaching inside, she slowly pulled out the glistening diamond, still as beautiful and polished as the day Jim had first gotten it. Mary held it up in the air, inspecting it from every angle. It still seemed to give of a slight glow. After but a brief moment had gone by, she suddenly plopped the diamond into her mouth, and Jim recoiled in horror as he heard the sound of diamond breaking between the chimps teeth.

“What are you doing?!” He exclaimed in shock. He couldn’t believe what he had just witnessed. Such a beautiful diamond, now gone forever. But more importantly, how was it possible for a monkey to bite through a diamond using it’s teeth?

“Enjoying my breakfast, punk.”

“Wh-What?”

“Now get out.”

Suddenly, Jim was pushed out the door, and he heard the red door slam shut behind him. He scratched his head as he suddenly heard a country remix of a Hall and Oates song begin blasting inside the house. As he walked away, he wondered what had just happened, and thought about how it could even be possible for someone to be a monkey’s uncle.